Has Gay Lost Its Mojo?
The Gay Surf Report: Mojo Gay bars are deserted. Chat rooms are boring. Gay neighborhoods have become tourist attractions and sex clubs seem to have run out of steam. What is happening to the gays? Are we becoming too common for our own good? [click for Mojo]






Has Gay Lost Its Mojo?

Is being gay really 'gay' anymore? Do we have our own secret places where we can go be ourselves and act differently then the majority of society? Seems like a lot of gay bars have become deserted, the Internet isn't as satisfying as it once was, and gay neighborhoods have become tourist attractions and safe havens for straight girls to live in. Heck, even sex clubs have lost their luster since drug use has subsided and gay guys aren't super sexed up on meth and x. Have gays become complacent? Common?

Since gay boys have become more mainstream it seems as though being gay isn't what it used to be. Look around, stylish straight guys aren't really all that different from young gay guys in dress, style, and mannerisms. In fact, flirting and showing affection between straight guys is now the norm and some straight guys are even more concerned with their look and clothes than your average gay guy. Plus, with tons of rap stars singing about anal sex and rimming, you've now got tons of curious straight white boys wondering what that's all about and making it more common for them to ask their girlfriends to participate in sex acts that were once considered taboo and only part of the gay scene.

Everyday you can see gays in the media and everyone probably either has a gay sibling, relative, coworker, or neighbor. We're not so much of a mystery anymore since the entire gay lifestyle has either been written about, filmed, or posted on the Internet. Straight guys are more sexually expressive and comfortable with their sexiness and now find acting sexy and showing off their half naked bodies hot. Wasn't this a gay phenomenon just a while back? And what about the tons of videos on myspace and youtube with straight guys acting gay, or lip-syncing with their shirts off; and pictures of naked groups of guys posing for the camera hiding their junk? Crazy shiz...

If you think about it, does the desire to be with another guy sexually even make you part of a community anymore? Do gay guys connect in any other way with other gay guys other then sexually? Even within the gay community there exists divisions between race, age, and desires, and we're not even taking into consideration the whole lesbian and trannie part of the community.  Maybe we don't have that much in common at all. Maybe we're not even a community per se. Maybe we have more in common with straight guys then we originally thought.

To become more accepted and mainstream is probably what the gay community originally envisioned and that's a good thing but it seems that even though straight guys have taken on a more gay persona, they're still not comfortable with the whole gay concept. Yeah a lot of straight guys have gay friends now and girls have always gravitated towards gay guys probably because there's no sexual tension, but overall being gay is still an oddity with the majority of society. Gay is now an adjective, like acting retarded, absurd, something to be embarrassed about. But the harm implied by calling someone gay has been watered down by teens, sorta like white teens calling each other the n-word. The hatefulness of the implication has been eliminated by frequent use.

So maybe gay boys aren't really that much different then straight guys. We both seem to be in pursuit of the same thing: Attention and getting off. Strip away the fact that we're sexually into different sexes and what you have left is guys wanting to be in the company of other guys. Maybe the need to feel close to someone of the same sex is there to fill a void left because relationships are so much harder to come by these days. And the majority of young people are in pursuit of companionship rather than traditional relationships, and that allows them to become closer to someone of the same sex without actually having to have the sex to make it meaningful.

So if society is in an ever evolving stage, maybe the differences between straight and gay are becoming blurred. If you're young and you can separate sex from a relationship then maybe you've evolved into someone that can appreciate another person for who they are, not who they desire. This is a good thing, with traditional relationships falling apart on a regular basis maybe guys will realize the value in the friendships they can make with other guys whether straight or gay. Just maybe.


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